La Belle et La Boeuf: A Review

I want to preface my food blog posts by saying this: I am an extremely picky eater. I hate a lot of things that most people LOVE. I can't stand ketchup, mayo, mustard, pickles, onions, you get the picture. I'm the girl who orders a plain cheeseburger... So no, my reviews aren't HARSH or CRITICAL of a venue its just that I am PICKY. It's MY opinion.

So tonight my husband decided he wanted to go try a place called La Belle et La Boeuf (which is a "cute" play on words and meant to sound like The Beauty and The Beast). In English their name literally means "the Pretty and the Beef"....or Burger Bar.

Appearance: I have to say that I'm really torn about the look of the venue. I love the graffiti on the walls, it gives the restaurant a really urban feel...and then I get confused by the tables randomly in the middle...that gives it a real barn yard feel. I am so happy that there was one super spacious and comfortable booth available for us because I didn't feel like sitting smack dab in the middle of the place and would freeze my butt off with the door opening. Those tables are just really weirdly placed. I blame the actual SPACE of the restaurant  It has a lot of angles that make no sense and the owners obviously did what they could to maximize the amount of people/tables they could have in one given space. It's normal. But the look itself is really confusing to me. Super high ceilings (LOVE!), graffiti on the walls (love), oak looking tables in the middle of the dining area (not a fan of). They have the most amazing bar I've ever seen with shelves and shelves of "the good stuff" that they even have a ladder to get things down. It's fun and playful. I like it.  I give the appearance 4 out of 5.

Menu: Sorry owners of La Belle et La Boeuf you lost some MAJOR points here. Your menu is ONLY in French. Most places in Montreal/Laval have English menu's for their English speaking clients. If NOT the descriptions of the food are in both languages. If I don't know what the hell is on the menu how can I decide what I want? I only pretend to not be able to read/understand French but it doesn't mean that I don't want to feel COMFORTABLE when making a decision regarding my food. Anyway they have flimsy paper menu's that make you feel like you are in your pre-teens and teens again (depending on your current age I guess). They have snap shots of celebrities on the front and back cover and its really eye catching and fun to try to guess who everyone is while waiting to be served.  I give menu design a 2 out of 5. I'm telling you, NOT having an English option is a huge point deduction.

Now let's get to what is ON the menu: BURGERS or POUTINE. Seriously, that is 95% of the menu. They have 3 types of Mac and Cheese if you are interested, a few salads, but the majority of the menu is based around burgers and poutine. Now its hard for me to pick a meal mainly because I'm not  huge fan of burgers and I hate poutine.

I started off ordering a drink the size of my head. We were lucky enough to arrive during their happy hour
which meant that we could get 1 litre mason jar drinks for half price. I went with a "Dead Kennedy" which was really tasty but I have no idea what the hell was in it. I remember something about rum and I was like "sold!" Can I make a suggestion? When serving drinks in huge ass mason jars you might want to consider getting mason jars with handles. I had to drink with two hands!   (Please ignore my no makeup self. I wasn't expecting to go out to eat the minute I got home from work!)

So now our waiter comes over to ask what we'd like to eat and I casually ask "Do you have an English menu" (I read a few reviews online and knew the answer to that question would be no) and he apologized and said they didn't. I asked him how I was supposed to know what to eat if I didn't have a menu and he said he could guide me through it. I told him it wasn't really necessary as I could read the basics. He convinced us to try an appetizer while we decided on what to read and told us about the deep fried pickles. I can't stand pickles but then he said they are marinated in cherry Kool-Aid and that took me back to being 10 and going to my best friend's house and drinking the sugary goodness! I said I'd try it. I'm glad I did!!

They were just crunchy enough, just sour enough, just sweet enough. They were in other words, perfect. What wasn't so perfect was the sauce. You could still taste that mayo was the main ingredient (did you see I mentioned I hated it above?) and it was just HOT. No real flavor to the mayo other than hot. I like heat but I like sweet heat, or smoky heat... I like the heat to taste like something not just burn my mouth. The dipping sauce lacked flavor. But the pickles...oh my yummy.

Now I wasn't really in the mood for a burger but I decided on the "Avocado Burger". It was a burger with avocado, tomato/onion salsa, and ranch dressing (I asked for it on the side). Before trying the burger as a whole I took a taste test of just the burger. It was boring. There was ZERO flavor. No smoke, no grill, no seasoning...it just tasted like cooked, unseasoned beef. So take it as a warning, if you are going here do not order a plain burger, order something that will give the meat flavor. I bit into my burger and my mouth was so happy. I hate onions but I love salsa and this one had great flavor. The avocado was neither over ripe or underripe. It was excellent. My only suggestion would be to cut the tomato chunks smaller. They were too large and kept jumping out of my burger.  I got a side of fries and cole slaw (and a pickle again..that i didn't eat...because it wasn't fried). The fries were shoestring fries and needed salt...and the coleslaw was bland. The sides didn't do it for me but the burger was great.

The husband went with something a lot more adventurous than I'd ever try. He went with a peanut butter burger with bananas. For those of you who know me in real life will know that a group of my friends and I took a road trip to Boston to have a Peanut Butter Burger. You have some mighty high expectations to live up to La Belle et La Boeuf! The verdict? My husband loved it. He ate every last bite of that burger...me...I wouldn't touch it with a 10 foot pole because it looked messy. (Again, I'm not a huge fan of peanut butter, in fact my daughter is nearly 3 and I've never given her a PB&J sandwich because I don't like peanut butter...unless its covered in chocolate!) Oh did I mention it had bananas and BACON? His sides were onion rings and coleslaw too.

I'm PMSing and wanted to have some comfort food too so we decided to try some mac and cheese. They have 3 types on their menu: plain, with hot dogs, with smoked meat. Me, being boring, chose plain. It was okay but a bit too runny for me. I don't like soupy mac and cheese. I like it to be more together...more congealed? (no picture because I don't like slop!)

By now I'm completely full (did I tell you that at 3pm I had a slice of red velvet cheesecake that I made? Hey, I'm PMSing...) but husband wanted to try dessert. Our waiter suggested to us the deep fried toast...which is basically a fried PB&J sandwich with bananas and drizzled (drenched) in maple syrup. I'm not a fan of any of those ingredients so I wasn't thrilled with the suggestion but my husband went with it. 

I took a bite of it and wanted to die. It was gross. I think I've come to a conclusion that peanut butter should NEVER EVER be served warm and toast like bread should never be deep fried then soaked in maple syrup. The fact that my husband was able to eat more than one or two bites kind of disgust me. Do his taste buds not work?!  So food wise I give them a 3 on 5

Service: Our waiter was Antonie and he was amazing. Super attentive, very helpful, and polite  He didn't just serve our food and leave. He asked our feed back, he told us his personal favorites. He was great and I wish that there were more waiters like him in the world! Service 5 on 5

Overall: I would probably go back to La Belle et La Boeuf but it would have to be on one of those nights when I'm really craving a hamburger. This isn't a place you can go to when you don't know what you want or if you aren't in a hamburger mood. I need more variety on my menu but if you are a burger lover this is the place to go!

Never Sleep Again

Today's Prompt is:

If you could be given the option to never sleep and also never be tired, would you take it if it meant you'd also never dream again?

This has got to be one of the hardest questions for a person who suffers from insomnia. I rarely sleep as it is and I am lucky enough to still be able to function perfectly well with only 2 to 4 hours of sleep a night. Sure there are days I feel I need to take speed in order to keep my eyes open or my eyes sting from the lack of sleep but those days are few and far between.  Due to insomnia  (at least I think that's it) I don't dream often. I guess if you don't sleep you can't dream...

So would I take this option? Considering I already don't sleep much and rarely dream...and oddly enough the dreams I do have always end up coming true (sort of like a premonition) I guess I'm leaning towards taking  someone up on this offer. Imagine how much more things I could get done in a day? If I wasn't sleeping, I couldn't over sleep and start my day off on the wrong foot because I am now running late and still trying to get D ready for school! 

I'd be all caught up on my tv shows and reading in short amount of time. I'd have more time (and energy) to cook, clean, read, blog, exercise, bake, etc.

I'm only seeing positive aspects to this, nothing bad so far. Would the lack of sleep interfere with my creativity? I know that the prompt says we wouldn't be tired but whatever creative? What about alert? Quick? Witty? How is my mood? If I don't get at least 3 hours of sleep you can just call me Mega Bitch...

I think there are a lot of factor to consider and although I want to wave a magic wand and make this happen I can't even begin to tell you how great I feel at the end of the day (early morning) when I go to my room, take off my clothes and get in my pjs, hop onto my cool side of the bed and pull up the cool covers and slowly let my brain go.  I don't think I could give up that luxury for anything.... when you have a high stress day, a busy day, a day of running like a chicken with your head cut off.....those few minutes are the best!

Song That Gives You Energy

Hello there! Seems as if its been a while since I've actually posted a REAL blog. I just checked, my last post was Feb 19, 2012. That is insane. Anyway, to get back into the swing of things I thought that I would participate in BlogHer's NaBloPoMo. The theme this month is "Energy". I need some of that for writing...so here goes nothing.

Oh...before I begin...if you are still following this blog...THANKS :) Love ya!

What is your favourite song that gives you energy? 

I think it's mentioned somewhere on my about me page or in one of my posts, MUSIC IS MY LIFE. I seriously turn to music for everything. Lyrics tend to speak to me. My favorite song sort of tends to change depending on a situation that is happening in my life. I find myself liking certain songs and playing them over and over again and not even realizing why. A while later I'll be like, "Oh my gosh..isn't that weird that I liked the song and this happened?"

One of the songs that instantly lifts my spirits is actually new to my playlist. It's Hedley's 9 Shades of Red. The beat is great, the lyrics rock, and the tempo is so upbeat. It makes me happy and has me jumping around doing a happy dance.

Another song that gives me a bunch of energy, especially when getting ready to go out, is by someone most of y'all probably haven't heard of. Fashion by Rogue Traders. This song was introduced to me by a few Aussie friends years and years ago and its remained on my playlist forever. It's such a great song!

One of my favorite songs to boost me up is by Natasha Bedingfield called I'm A Bomb (and also Single, and We're All Mad, and basically anything from her CD "Unwritten".

Here is a little known fact about me, I wish I could sing. Seriously. I wish I could bust out in song like the cast of Glee at any given moment. I might sort of be guilty of walking through my house when I was younger busting out into random songs that I'd make up about whatever I was doing. I might sort of be guilty of still doing the same thing...just now the lyrics stay in my head. 

I hope y'all check out some of the songs I posted and let me know if you like them. I personally LOVE them!

Le Fumoir Rubs - A Review

Le Fumoir has the perfect combination of sweet and heat. Their sauces are to die for and the meats are perfectly smoked.  If you are looking for super tender fall off the bone ribs then don't come to Le Fumoir. The way we Southerns like our meat is with a little BITE to it. Sure, the meat at Le Fumoir is tender but BBQ is about being messy and their ribs require you to bite into them to get that full satisfaction of eating a rib.

The meat is tender, sweet, juicy, and the sauce adds a bit of heat. If you are looking for extra heat try another one of their sauces that they bring to the tables.

What else is amazing about Le Fumoir? Oh let's see: Great prices, HUGE portions, GREAT flavor. It really is all you can ask for.

So far I've tried the following dishes:

Pulled Pork Sandwich:  I really wish I would have read the entire description because I'm not a fan of the slaw in my sandwich but I can't complain, it was great. And its a really nice way of making me NOT have to order slaw as a side.

Smoked Mac & Cheese:  To quote Haley from One Tree Hill "Mac and Cheese is the food of Gods". Well Haley, if you've ever had Fe Fumoir's Mac and Cheese I can definitely agree with you on that! Rich, creamy, just enough smoke flavor, gooey melted cheese...where exactly can you go wrong with this dish? I think I could actually eat this as an entire meal. 

Slaw: Have you ever had slaw with apples and poppy seeds? I hadn't until I went to Le Fumoir and I don't think I can ever go back to another slaw again. Do you think the owner would give me the recipe? 

Beef Ribs: Y'all can talk about pork baby back ribs all you want but those are a dime a dozen in Montreal. Rich SMOKED beef ribs with that smoke ring and pink center. OHMYGOD! Just enough pull to make me feel like I'm eating real ribs and that excellent flavorful dry rub. Do they deliver?

Beef Brisket: This is a Southern Staple. If you can get this meat right then you've made it. Le Fumoir, I'm happy to announce that you've made it. Officially the BEST brisket I've had outside of Texas! 

Fries/ Sweet Potato Fries: Excellent flavor. Excellent seasoning. So tasty. NOT Frozen fries. Believe me, I'd know!!

Beef Ribs: Holy smokes! These ribs are HUGE! Bigger than my head. I do not understand how anyone in their right mind can actually eat 3 of these! Tender, meaty, smokey, juicy, literally melts the second this touches your mouth. Everyone I've been with has tried this and fallen in love!

Pulled Pork Poutine: These Quebecers are all about their cheese curd and covering fries with gravy. At first I was hesitant, I was a little afraid...and then I fell in love. The pulled pork is just a miracle meat that makes everything amazing.

Smoked Veggies: Excellent side dish. Smoked veggies later mixed with balasamic vinegar and oil. My gosh, a party in my mouth. 

Chocolate Covered Bacon: I didn't think there was a way to incorporate meat into a dessert but RUBS managed to do it. Chocolate covered bacon covered with nuts and served with ice cream. Oh la la!

Reading this review you'll probably think I'm 500 pounds but in the sake of disclosure, I've been numerous times and have tried food off of my friends plates.

Want my personal suggestion: KEEP GOING BACK! The food is amazing and you slowly have to work your way down the menu!

Words Fail Me

So I've spent that last hour and a half staring at this blank page trying to think of how to put everything "on paper" but its just not coming. For the first time in my life words have failed me.

I will try to organize my thoughts and write something. It's about time I blog or something right?

Guest Post: Bucket List

So if you've been following me on Twitter or Facebook you'll know that I have been talking about having guest bloggers on my blog to offer a different point of view and different content. I present to you, Brian Smith

When I first volunteered to guest blog and write about my bucket list, I thought, “This will be easy.” After all, everyone has stuff they want to do and want to accomplish in life before they kick the bucket.

But it turns out that putting those wants and desires onto paper is a lot harder than I expected. What should be included? How specific should it be? Does every want and desire—no matter how seemingly trivial—be included or should a bucket list only include the really big things, the show stoppers, the stuff that will be legen—wait for it—dary.

Here’s the thing about a bucket list: It shouldn’t just be a wish list. It shouldn’t just be a list of all those wonderful things that would be really cool to do before you die but also really hard to cross off the list. Yes, climbing Mt Everest would be incredibly awesome. But, also, incredibly difficult to achieve. I once rode a tram 6000 feet to the top of Sandia Mountain in New Mexico. That is the extent of my mountain climbing experience. Climbing Mt Everest is not on my bucket list, no matter how incredibly awesome it would be.

A bucket list, however, probably shouldn’t contain the mundane, either. Unless you’re a risk of an early death, including “Living until I’m 60” shouldn’t be included. Finding that right balance, however, is tricky.

But I think I’ve done it.

Brian Smith’s Bucket List:

1. Drink a Bellini at Harry’s Bar in Venice

2. Stand in St. Peter’s Square and hear the Pope’s Easter address

3. Run with the bulls in Pamplona

4. Watch an FC Barcelona match at the Camp Nou

5. Attend the World Cup

6. Be in attendance at the NCAA Final Four as the University of Kentucky wins a championship in basketball

7. Cliff dive in Hawai’i

8. Visit all 50 states

9. Travel to every continent

10. Gamble at a high roller’s table in Vegas

11. New Year’s Eve in Times Square

12. Learn to play one song really well on the piano

13. Speak French fluently

14. Flirt with a supermodel

15. Midsummer’s Night Party at the Playboy Mansion

16. Take batting practice at a major league baseball stadium

17. Meet the President

18. Read the Bible from start to finish

19. Sky dive

20. Be a contestant on Jeopardy

Feel free to follow me on Twitter @briansmith31681 or check out my blog briansmith31681.blogspot.com

And, many thanks to Jenny for this opportunity. She rocks!

Since when did women become so anti-women?

So last night I came home from my sister's house and was looking forward to a relaxing night of mind numbing dumb reality TV. I mean, how else does one relax on Saturday if they don't want the humidity of the Jacuzzi to wreck their just blown out hair? 


So while watching my mind numbing TV I was also on Facebook and my dear friend Sunny had commented on a link. I read the title of the link and sort of rolled my eyes when I saw whose post she commented on. (I'm not a huge fan of the original sharer) but curiosity got the best of me and I decided to read the article. I was very happy to see that the author was not the person I'm not fond of but shocked to read the article. 


The article in itself was shocking. To sum it up, in the state of Virginia they want to pass a law that FORCES women seeking an abortion to first have a transvaginal ultrasound for NO MEDICAL reason. If they do not do the ultrasound that is basically shoving a probe in their vagina they cannot get an abortion. According to the article a woman can't make an informed decision about her body unless she gets this ultra sound AND if she chooses NOT to look at the ultra sound video or listen to the heart beat it will be noted in her medical file. WTF?


Wait, let me repeat that again, a bit louder... WTF?!  


What shocked me more than the article were the comments on the original sharer's Facebook wall that were along the lines of "Well good, you should be able to see and hear the sound of the precious baby you are about to shop vac out of your vagina" "Why should the baby pay because the mother was a classless hussy who couldn't help but spread her legs". The woman on woman hate was just so aggravating and of course heart breaking.


A few things I don't understand:


1. Is every single abortion conducted in the US a result of a slutty girl/woman? I mean, are you telling me that people who use precautions to NOT get pregnant still don't end up pregnant? Birth control has never failed? 


2. Why are people trying to give more rights to a fetus than to the mother carrying the fetus? What if I'm pregnant and the pregnancy will kill me...do I have to continue my pregnancy because the government thinks an unborn child has more rights than I do? 


3. Why are women agreeing with the fat white men in Congress trying to decide what I can or cannot do with my body? Since these women think their "place" is to be a child bearing machine regardless of the circumstances why not just take away our right to vote too. I mean, if I can't decide what to do with my body and what affects my family why should I be allowed to vote for something that can effect the entire country?

A lot of the comments I read were just straight out hate against women. "Well you shouldn't have gotten pregnant if you can't take care of the baby" "Well you should just carry the baby to term and give it up for adoption" (because you know, our orphanages aren't already exploding out of control) and SERIOUSLY why is the pregnancy always the woman's fault? Did they go jerk off a man after her fell asleep reading the bible and use a turkey baster to impregnate ourselves and then after going through ALL that we just decided to get an abortion because, well, pregnancy just isn't for me? 


I was having a few twitter discussions about this and at first I thought one man agreed. He sort of did. He wanted to lessen the blow of FORCING a woman to get this ultra sound by changing the word forced to required. A woman isn't forced to have a vaginal probe, she is required.


It's FORCED. Change the word to anything you want its still forcing it. If you HAVE to do one thing to do another even if there is no medical reason then its forced. I do not give you consent to do medical procedures that are not medically required. For example men, if you go get a prostate exam and you consent to get your asshole probed by a finger does that mean you also give your consent to have a metal rod up your ass too? I mean, you gave consent for one medical procedure, that should mean the doctors can do anything to you regardless of your wishes...because you gave consent for one thing! Or how about if a man goes to get a vasectomy and is told, "I'm sorry but unless you first allow me to shove an ultra sound machine up your ass you can't get this done...."


That isn't okay is it? So why is it okay for women?


Forgive me if I'm wrong but isn't the U.S. a country that has separation of State from Church or do they only have the IDEA of it?   Most people who are against abortion state that they are this due to what the Bible says. Newsflash, NOT everyone shares the same religion so why should YOUR religion decide what someone does or doesn't do to their body? Again, forgive my ignorance but does the Bible not also mention something about not judging? If this is the case why are so many quick to judge a woman that has an abortion as a whore? A slut? A stupid careless girl? 



Let me explain something to you, because I've gotten facebook messages asking how many abortions I've had. My answer is this. NONE.


I'm Pro-Life for myself. I could not phantom getting an abortion unless continuing a pregnancy would kill me and leave my daughter motherless OR if the pregnancy was the result of a rape. On a legislative level I am pro-choice. I would NEVER force my beliefs or opinions on another woman. I'm pro-choice because I'm pro-woman. Pro-choice does NOT mean you are pro-abortion. It means you are pro-HAVING a choice in what to do. Oddly enough, it seems that the majority of pro-lifers equate that belief with anti-woman. I just do not believe that the government has the right to make a decision regarding what a woman can and cannot do with her body.


What are your thoughts on this topic? Do you agree? Disagree? Or would you like me just to STFU?